Non Formal Numbered Responses Discussion

DO NOT ANSWER IN ESSAY FORMAT. NON FORMAL NUMBERED RESPONSES PLEASE

1) The statement that I am choosing is: “I rode the train”. This sentence to me really looks plain. I think this sentence really need more description or details. My revision would look something like this: Last weekend I rode this gorgeous, flashy silver streamline bullet train through the narrow windy mountain passes and over these brilliantly constructed bridges with the most beautiful scenery I have ever seen. To me this sentence lacked the most out of all the examples. By using sentences like the ones given your either not getting your readers attention or holding their attention. You really don’t need a lot of description but enough to captivate and explain what your talking about. respond to this with the same sentence ” I rode the train” use vivid details like above but in different words. min 100 words max 150

2)

The sentence I picked was the Fourth of July is a holiday.

The Fourth of July is one of my favorite holidays because it is when my whole family gets together. The house would be filled with the laughter of children, the light sizzle of burgers being placed on a smoky hot grill, and my angry cousin yelling because grandma is cheating in Uno again. As the sky fades to black, we head out into the warm embrace of the summer night sky. My family goes out into our spacious backyard and look for the perfect spot to find to watch the fireworks and others take their place around the crackling fire pit with sticky marshmallows in hand.

The sentence I picked was the Fourth of July is a holiday.Use this sentence and revise with different words. min 100 words max 150

3)

I choose sentence: 5. There is one tree on the street where I live.

Revised sentence: Under the one big oak tree on my street many of the neighbors love to have family picnics.

I choose to revise the sentence this way because it describes the one tree on the street I live on and tells what can be done under the tree. This sentence has more detail and explanation of what kind of tree it is, and what is happening with the tree. This gives a view point and you can go on to describe a picnic that is happening under the big oak tree.

There is one tree on the street where I live. Use this sentence like the example above and revise with different words . min 100 words max 150

4)

Hello everyone,

The sentence I choose is number 9, My four-year-old son has learned the alphabet. My revised sentence is, My four-year-old-son has learned the alphabet, he can’t wait to start singing the abcs on his own.

I chose this sentence because I can understand that a parent would be excited that their child has learned the alphabet. Changing it to what the child is going to do with the alphabet gives the statement a point of view. I’m excited for my own son to learn the alphabet, that’s why I chose this sentence. When you give a sentence a point of view it makes it easier for the reader to understand and relate to it.

My four-year-old son has learned the alphabet. use this sentence like the example above and revise with different words . min 100 words max 150

5)What order do the pieces of an essay go in? What would be considered page 1 of an APA formatted paper? min 100 words max 150

6)The introduction is the first thing that readers read, but it is not necessarily the first thing a writer writes. How can you write an effective introduction when you don’t even know what’s going in the essay? min 100 words max 150

7)After reading Chapter 16 I have learned the importance of waiting to write you introduction paragraph after you have developed your ideas, writing your thesis statement, and drafted your essay. If you don’t know what the essay will actually be covering how can you write a introduction paragraph. After you have an idea of how your essay will develop you can then write a introduction paragraph that will interest your reader. Chapter 16 gave ideas to keep your reader interested. I like the technique that states a startling fact. That is a good way to capture your reader’s interest. Another way is to state a little known fact to keep the reader interested.

respond to number 7 with a minimum of 100 max 150 words